The Rise of the Mama Bear

Ten years ago I was given the greatest gift: a daughter. Before becoming a mother, I passed judgement on other moms. Many times I said things like, “My child would never act like that. My child would never be allowed to do, have, wear, x, y, and z.” But a lot of those “nevers” now occur daily in my life.

Insecurities and parenthood go hand in hand. We all feel like we’re failing and not living up to our full potential. Just when we think we’re doing ok, something happens that makes us feel inadequate. But we keep trying because there is no other option.

However, there are a small group of childless adults who are so hard pressed on ridiculing the way we handle our children. The majority of people understand how much we try on a daily basis. For those of you who are unable to have kids, my heart hurts for you and I cannot begin to know how you feel. For the rest of the judgemental turds, I’ll break it down for you. You have no idea what it’s like to have a broken heart and still be required to take care of a child. You have no idea how it feels being a mother when you feel like every part of your life is crashing down around you. And you most certainly have no idea what it’s like being a parent while struggling with deep depression and the only reason your heart is still beating is because of that child. Please understand that your negative thoughts and opinions are not needed and are unnecessary.

There is a particular group of mothers that I want to talk about: military moms. (This includes stepmothers, guardians and anyone who is given the responsibility of raising children.) Military moms kick ass! Being in the military is a lifestyle on its own. Adding motherhood into the mix makes things a little more tricky. To those who have served with kids, I applaud you. Breaking it down a little further, to the moms who made it to retirement (20+ years), you all have a very special place in my heart. Statistically, only about 10% of the total military retirees are women. Making it that far is no small feat. Add kids to it, and it’s nothing short of a miracle. There were so many times when I wanted to quit. But I stayed, not only for security of my daughter’s future but to show her that women can accomplish anything they set their minds to.

We all are trying every single day, to balance our lives and raise our children. Before passing judgment and pointing out the things you think are wrong, remember that you are not perfect and we are doing whatever we can to give our kids the life they deserve.

12.8.21